**(I saw this on another blog and thought it was cute. I just had to share)
My Dearest Baby Adalee,
Your current eviction date of May 12, 2010 has been set for the past 38+ weeks. In the past few months, I understand that you have become extremely comfortable in your current dwelling. Unfortunately, I need to discuss some of the key points of your lease with you.
The 0430am dance parties were not discussed in your lease, and they've been doing damage to the walls (ribs, bladder, stomach).
The blockage of a numerous amount of pipes and the leaking of others has to be put to an end!
Also, as far as adding square footage to the dwelling, we discussed a reasonable addition. You have surpassed that by much more than we discussed.
I have prepared another home for you to reside, so don't let house hunting be the reason you stay. Should your eviction date come and pass, please note that I will use forceful measures to remove you. I would like for this transition to be as painless and quick as possible. Please don't make this any harder than it has to be.
15 hours ago